As some of you know, I’m engaged too, with the wedding date of June 20th.
Never in a million years did I think I was going to be in this position. I want to go back to myself when I first started the planning process and say “you will never believe what’s going to be the thing to throw a wrench in your planning.” If I had known then what I know now, I would have spent less time worrying about my colors.
Now, I find myself refreshing the CDC’s website every ten minutes, and suddenly I can’t stand going on any sort of social media platform - which is hard considering it's my job. While I am scared and uncertain what’s going to happen in the future, I am also so sad that all of this had to happen around my wedding. With every news update my heart sinks deeper and deeper.
On March 15th, the CDC recommended that gatherings be limited to 50 people for the next eight weeks. My heart hurts for those couples that have already had to postpone or cancel their weddings. I wish I could hug you through the computer. While my wedding doesn’t fall within those 8 weeks, it falls not too long afterwards. Not to mention, I am getting married in the state of Virginia - my home state - which has some different guidelines than Kentucky. On March 31st the governor of Virginia extended this ban until June 10th. Just 10 days before my wedding.
Does this make me feel any better? Worse? I couldn’t tell you. I don’t know what I should do, I don’t know what I shouldn’t do. I am trying to stay calm and positive but I am sure every Spring bride can relate, it feels like my months of planning are quickly going down the drain and all I can do is pray from my home office.
As of now, the wedding is going on as planned. But, as of yesterday, I will no longer have a bachelorette party. I will not have a bridal shower. My fiancé and I will not be able to have our dream honeymoon that we planned. When you’re a little girl thinking about your dream wedding, no one can ever prepare you for something like this. No one could ever even imagine something like this happening.
If you are finding yourself in a similar situation as I am, twiddling your thumbs while trying not to cry, feeling guilty for grieving your wedding when some people are grieving the loss of family. I just want you to know, you are allowed to be sad. You are allowed to grieve, you are allowed to be frustrated, but you do not have to do it alone.
The first thing I would suggest first and foremost is getting in touch with your vendors. While they also have never been in a situation like this before, they have had to deal with cancellations and postponing. Connect with them (yes, all of them) and ask them what it would look like if you were pushed to postpone or worse, cancel. The sooner the better! Plus, sometimes it's just nice to hear from someone else that it’s going to be okay.
A note: If you at the point where you are debating postponing or canceling, from a vendor’s standpoint, I would postpone. Your vendors are just as devastated as you are, and their livelihood depends on weddings like ours. Plus, you deserve to have that party you’ve always dreamed of. If you cancel altogether vs. postpone, you will most likely lose any money you have already put forth. (You will need to refer to your signed contracts for more information on cancellations.)
As hard as it is, try to stop picturing your day as what it is “supposed” to look like. Maybe you planned a wedding for 200, but have you seen how romantic and totally gorgeous a small 50 person wedding could be?
And finally, keep telling yourself that it's going to be okay. That all the invitations, rentals, plans were for one thing, marrying your best friend. I think that’s the one thing that might be a silver lining to this whole ordeal, you see what truly matters. Try not to think about it, logout of Instagram, do that Pinterest recipe you’ve had saved on your board forever. As much as I think it will, stressing about this situation will not make anything better. It is truly out of our hands, and what’s meant to be will be.
Myself, and everyone here at Louisville Wedding Magazine, is sending so much love and support to all of our couples as well as wedding professionals in this scary, unpredictable time. We are here to help in any way that we can.
Marketing Director, Louisville Wedding Magazine